How to change a belief with life coaching

The more I coach and train others, the more I realize I am just a facilitator. The less I do, the more my client is able to go through his own process. That’s the power of coaching. Being present and guiding my clients is the most important thing to get the job done. 70% of what I do has to do with making the right connection, being present; the remaining 30% is about discussion techniques and coaching tools.

Life coaching is about making people more conscious. I cannot think of a job that is more rewarding than helping my clients to become more authentic: assisting them to get in touch with their true feelings and unraveling all the false beliefs they have about themselves and others. In this process they are teaching themselves to change their reality: internal and external. It’s like pealing an onion. After one layer is removed you work with the next one, getting closer and closer to the core.

Part of this process is a realization that what you believe and think on the inside will influence all that happens on the outside. This means once we change a limiting belief the reality around us will change as well. This is an amazing process to witness. But how does this work?

Our mind is an iceberg

Our mind is divided into two parts; our conscious mind and our subconscious mind. Our conscious mind is what you are using right now reading through this article. You may have an inner dialogue going on, or you are thinking about a problem which you need to solve. Our subconscious mind works more subtle, on a deeper level, and this is where our beliefs and fears are stored.

I often compare the human mind with an iceberg. The conscious mind is the part above water. The subconscious mind is the part below, much bigger and not visible, but responsible for most of our behavior, beliefs and acting as a huge filter in how we see and interact with the world around us.

Someone who rationally knows he can be as important as anyone else, may hold a deeper limiting belief about being and feeling unimportant. This person can think and act as if he is important but without eliminating the belief “I’m not important” nothing will change. In coaching I use wide range of mental and transformational tools to reach the subconscious mind on a deep level.

Once a limiting belief has been removed, the reality one is facing will change as well. It is important to know that real change starts from the inside out. Many people believe that they need something outside of them to be happy. Good luck, winning the lottery, getting the right job or meeting the right mate. People often feel depressed, hoping for a better life. It may be a difficult message to share but it’s actually their state of mind that is responsible for most of what’s happening to them and keeping them from reaching their full potential.

If you change your beliefs, your filter to the outside world will change and your reality will change with it; not the other way around. You first need to be happy before your reality can change. Once you realize this you have the power to change anything.

2 comments… add one
  • Cheryl from thatgirlisfunny Jul 7, 2010 @ 14:36

    I love this conversation! The process you’re talking about has to be experienced to be understood. Change does start from the inside. I run a weekly blog carnival called Stay Young from the Inside Out (people send in their contributions and I make a list). So much effort is placed on looking good on the outside, when it’s our internal state that matters most.

    Actions speak louder than words and I think are a true reflection of our internal dialogue. When it doesn’t match, we’re in for a rough ride ahead.

    I would love to have you contribute links to my carnival. Your titles are super sticky 😀

  • Nea | Self Improvement Saga Jul 13, 2010 @ 4:35

    This is so true…the deeply held subconscious beliefs have to be dealt with if we ever expect to see change. It’s what we’re least conscious of that creates so much of our life experience.

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